Trials and Tribulations of the Tenderoni Weblog

“Oh, I thought it was the trash!”

You’ll Get Nothing and Love It!

Posted by itiwtt on August 30, 2007

Bad Driver’s Handbook So I’m driving to work this morning. The usual scene: me, traffic, and NPR. Yes, NPR. I like to get my news from a reliable source before I read it on my lengthy list of slanderous blogs. Besides, I’ve recently banned my habitual group of morning shows due to the booty music intermissions (aka morning mixes) and the lengthy commercials. For some reason I’ve become extremely irritated with the extent of the commercials. It’s gotten so bad that I usually opt to turn the radio completely off rather than scan through the other stations. All that station hopping was starting to be way too much work for me.

Morning Radio Schedule:

  • Turn on Steve at 7:00-7:15 to hear the Strawberry Letter.
  • Hope and pray that I didn’t miss Gary’s Tea, which is sometime around 7:15, so I turn it to Rickey.
  • Turn to NPR to get traffic report and today’s news (I prefer that the important information come from real news people).
  • Turn back to Rickey to listen to the Chicken and Waffle Mix, but change the station because I can’t take too much boom-boom-kack in the morning.
  • Realize I kinda miss a particular person (maS yetnuP) from another station I used to listen to (401K). Turn to that station, but can’t tolerate some of the new people (I won’t mention them) and end up switching back and forth between the other two stations.

Mind you, this is all while fighting traffic.

SIDENOTE: Technically, I didn’t pass the driver’s test, so it’s possible that I don’t completely adhere to all the etiquette rules of driving. Therefore, if the following actions are totally out of hand, please let me know.

As I was driving today, like every morning, I refused to let a few people over who I believed had absolutely no reason at all to get over…other than because they just felt like it. Here’s the scene: I’m driving in the passing lane, and a car from the next lane signals. To me, a signal is a gesture that requests for my permission. He asked for my permission, and I said, no. “No,” as in “You don’t need to get over. Stay your ass over there. You’re not going to get anywhere any faster by being in front of me opposed to beside me. I’m not letting you in. The end.” It’s not like he was trying to exit. What was he gonna do other than be 5 feet from his last position. We’re both bumper-to-bumper you idiot!  Please understand that I’m not always this defensive. If someone really needs to get over, and they ask (via blinker), I’ll allow them. The only valid reasons for squeezing in during rush-hour traffic are if a)the person in front of you is driving too slow or b)you’re behind a semi.

In closing, I would like anyone who travels on 35S from 7:00am-7:25am to realize that simply turning on your blinking means nothing to me. Blink all you want!

Blink = “Excuse me, m’am. Can I get over?”

My disregard for you and your blinker = “No!”


“Hey, I started out mopping the floor just like you guys. But now… now I’m washing lettuce. Soon I’ll be on fries; then the grill. And pretty soon, I’ll make assistant manager, and that’s when the big bucks start rolling in.” ~ Maurice


I love that the kids have went back to school and are no longer in the streets, but I despise the traffic they have caused.  More parents should car pool!!!  I have had the worst time trying to get to work this week!  The worst part is the traffic is not where any schools are.  If it wasn’t for Rickey I wouldnt make it thru my hour commute (today’s prank call Oscar got blown up in the microwave and the whole house smelled like sausages LOL).  And what’s with the rubbernecking and being nosy when the wreck is in the median and it’s a minor fender bender.  WOULD YOU DRIVE!!!!  NOTHING TO SEE HERE!!!!  Now if there’s ambulances and firetrucks, then you get a free look pass.



What do you get when have 98% bad drivers and thousands of cars? SHIT!!!!!  I’m not trying to be funny, but I did have a accident on Friday in traffic. BTW I was hit by one of the 98%. 



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